She was cold.
But she didn’t want to let go.
The others had loosened their grip and dropped long ago.
Some carried by the wind to destinations unknown.
Others lay beneath her.
Cracked and torn apart by all of the optional moments of breaking that life offered.
She could feel herself getting lighter and lighter.
As if all of her substance was disappearing within her shell.
But she didn’t feel “less than.” In fact, she grew stronger in wisdom and spirit every day!
Some she missed terribly.
Others she knew long ago would just mindlessly do what everyone else was doing regardless of whether they were ready.
Some would jump early - determined to do What they Wanted WHEN they wanted.
So convinced they knew better than everyone else.
They shouted their supposed knowledge to everyone as they jumped from the security of Tree.
None of their shoutings helped anyone they yelled their facts to as they propelled into the unknown.
For truly it was the unknown.
Everyone thought they had life after Tree figured out.
Some thought the power lay within themselves.
They jumped before they had dropped all of their heavy moisture of life from Tree.
Tree had been quiet for quite some time now. Not really giving instructions to any of the acorns as they let go and jumped.
Debate grew among the acorns before the mass exodus. “How do you not see that we are supposed to jump now?”
Others shouted “If Tree really were the leader we needed right now why is he silent? I say if we go together, we have a better chance of making it!”
And still others “I have the answers! It is as ancient as time! Millions of acorns before us all pulse within our veins! It can be explained by every chemical and every reaction within our shell! If you aren’t going to take hold of the ancient process I will not wait for you, nor will I waste my time hoping you come. You see it or you don’t.”
She was mocked by the others.
It’s cold, we have lost the protection of the leaves!
Tree sent them on their way leaving us without leaf protection, and what does He do for us?
Tree has left us out here alone! He is silent, he’s allowed the leaves to go?
I don’t see how He is even relevant anymore.
Times are changing, This is new! Life has never seen this before and Tree is silent. Why do you hang onto Him? Come! Prepare to jump with us when we go!
To be honest she couldn’t.
She isn’t really sure she knows why!
She just feels it as strongly as she feels her shell. …..
Hang on. ….
Just hang on. For how long? … silence ..
When will I know? … silence …
Why am I getting lighter? …. Silence …
What happened to my loved ones? … Silence …
Many questions back and forth but no answers.
Just the overwhelming sense to just … hold … on.
She trusted Tree.
He gave her life!
She sprang forth from some invisible force within Him that no one could see or explain.
They all did.
One day, on his branches, a tiny lump bubbled up from within the bark.
The lump became a bulb, and before long all of the acorns emerged!
Some grew alone, some grew in pairs or groups, but they all surfaced together.
He gave them protection, shade with the thick canopy of leaves to cover them, and moisture.
The pulsing lifeblood she could feel within her.
Each acorn had been given the same start.
The same care, the same blessing.
How could some decide They were the wisest one?
How could some decide that Tree was irrelevant and obsolete?
Tree had been here giving life for many cycles before her and her family!
You could tell by all of the rotting shells at his base!
So many that jumped too soon, or too late.
She wasn’t sure. HE is the one who had been here before.
He had seen the cycle happen to many acorn lives before her and surely many more to come.
He has been silent but how does that make him unworthy all of a sudden?
She would hold on.
When morning came she was Sure she heard Tree whisper her name.
It wasn’t the same name all of the acorns called her, but her heart knew it was Her name. The one he called her by.
It was total comfort and didn’t seem strange at all.
She loved her old name with her acorn family, but when she heard this new name
whispered that morning, she knew she would turn her face to that name any day if she were forced to choose.
He said my name.
He is moving. Just …. Hang … On.
Things are getting really unsure.
Very few voices came from her acorn family on the tree.
They used to be a mighty chorus of one song at birth.
Now there’s just a small ensemble if even that.
She knew she wasn’t the only one hanging on, even though there weren’t very many.
She grieved for all of the other voices that were once as much a part of her anchor to tree as her own stem.
As they broke off, and rejected Tree’s wisdom she grieved.
Each loss made her examine whether she too would let go.
Tree would allow it.
He never Made you stay.
He just lovingly, steadfastly, cared for you when you did.
“You will know when it’s time”
There it was again!
She Knew it!
He was choosing to be silent!
He is not dead or scared to answer, or irrelevant or any of the other things the others said! He was waiting to see who would hold on!
“With everything in me I’ll hold tight until he says it’s time.” she thought.
It took a few mornings more before she heard him again.
It was Hard to hold on.
Her body was old and frail.
Almost all of life’s moisture had drained from her.
Her shell was dried out and cracking in some spots and her spirit felt lighter.
She didn’t know how much more she could hold on.
“Good mornin’ darlin … today is the day. You will fulfill your destiny today. You have held on and your body is ready. Without waiting until the whole process was complete, you would never be able to live your purpose! Well done.”
“Tree! We waited so long to hear your voice? We cried out to you! Why were you silent?”
“I spoke to you every day. The multitude were only listening for the ways they wanted to be answered. I gave you life, strength, a place to anchor to, a shelter in every storm, but it wasn’t enough.”
She could sense his sorrow in this.
“Some of them were right, the lifeblood, the acorn process runs through all of your veins. The cycle is ancient. But they began to trust the ancient cycle more than they trusted me. When I moved on their behalf and gave them strength, they received it as part of the process and something they deserved rather than something that had been given.”
“What happened to them?”
“Some will still fulfill their purpose, though it will be filled with struggle, and they will never be as strong as they were supposed to be. They will battle the wind and the animals and heavy rains and it will be difficult. They didn’t hang on and receive all of my strength the process is designed to give. Their road will be hard. Others will sprout but never bear fruit. They will never raise up a single acorn, and eventually, they will die. Still, others lay below you. Letting go on their own power, still so young and full of sap they were too heavy. They dropped directly below where they let go. The animals cracked their shells open and destroyed the seed. The shells will remain and rot forever.
But you, and a few others held fast. You have received everything I have to give you through the process. You have shed all of life’s sap and your seed is light. When you let go, the wind will carry you to where you are meant to die.”
“Yes, you will drop to the ground that has been prepared to receive your seed. Your shell will die and crack open allowing your seed to sprout. It will take many seasons but you will grow. You’ll feel my life source pulsing within you and you will be strong. Eventually, you will bear fruit. You will hear a chorus of acorns sing within your arms. You’ve watched the process, you’ve seen it happen. You must listen for my voice when bearing fruit. If you speak too much or too often, you will damage the fruit.”
“But when I let go, how will I hear your voice?”
“I’ll always be inside you. Be patient, steadfast, and Hold On. Don’t just listen for the ways you want to hear me speak. Listen for all the ways I Am, for you will surely miss life’s purpose if you’re only looking for me in the things you want. I’m always there.”
Wisdom and ancient revelation shooting through her like a storm.
“You aren't just Tree are you?”
“See, you listened, and it became clear. I am your Creator, Tree is what you called me because it was all you could see in your youth. You had to cling to something you could see and feel. This tree, this body. He has been a good, faithful, and fruitful servant. I spoke through him from the beginning. This is your purpose. Let me speak through you. Rise up, bear fruit, be steady in easy times and in peril. Some of your fruit will make the full process. Some will become full of themselves and strike out without learning how to hear me without question. They will struggle. Others will let go on their own and never produce.
Love them all give them all the same start. Know that they will all choose what they will choose. That is my gift to them. The few who hang on and learn what you have learned will too, go on and bear fruit. It is my way. I never change. Not even when some believe they have found a new and better way. It will all make sense in the end.”
“I am ready. I’m not going to lie, it’s easier knowing I won’t lose you.” she said with a smile of relief.
“Never. Now let go.” Creator said.
She never questioned him again. It shot unbelievable pain through her every cycle hearing the voices of those deceived.
Those who thought they didn’t need Creator.
Some days she thought she couldn’t bear it and wanted to stop.
Wanted to stop giving of herself and feeling the grief.
But of the ones who held on...
Who believed in the process without transferring their trust to it alone…. Those gave her great hope, great joy.
The numbers were incredibly small compared to all who had been given birth.
She tried a few different things to make more of them stay, but in the end, just like Creator said, she damaged their seed in the process.
Some she damaged still held on in spite of her mistake, because in the end it’s all about the seed inside each acorn.
No one can know what each one holds.
She loved them all and just like Creator encouraged her to do.
She let them go.